Change the way you think about things

You can learn to recognise unhelpful ways of thinking, just as you can learn to recognise the signs of stress and then substitute a much more positive approach. Try following the steps below.

1.      Start by counting up how many negative and unhelpful thoughts you have every day and how much of the day was taken up with these.

2.      Work out more positive responses that you could have substituted for each unhelpful thought, so that you are seeing each problem in a different light.

3.      Practice the positive thoughts and use them for each similar situation in the future.

4.      In any given situation, ask yourself whether your thought relates to the facts.  You say to yourself, “I’ve done hopelessly in that exam” ask yourself if that is really true. What you probably saying is that you could have done slightly better, but all of us tend to be highly self-critical in that situation. The truth is that all of us can do better at any task and none of us can achieve perfection all the time. You have done the exam and you have done your best, so congratulate yourself on what you have achieved. If you are able to look at alternative interpretation of your negative thoughts in the way and see how damaging it is to blame yourself, you can train yourself to think more positively and feel better about yourself in the process. Thinking positively gives you a sense of control in your life, of achievement and satisfaction. If motivates you, helps you concentrate, and is picked up by people around you. So remember the following points whenever you are tempted to think negatively.

·         Your unhelpful thoughts are not borne out by the true facts.

·         You are jumping to conclusions.

·         There are other ways of looking at any situation. There is a good side to most things.

·         Your unhelpful thoughts may hinder you rather than help you.

·         It is unrealistic to think only in terms of black and white.

·         Just because one thing goes wrong, it doesn’t change everything else.

·         You have strengths as well as weakness.

·         Praise rather than blame yourself.

·         You should not shoulder all the responsibility when things go wrong.

·         Perfection is rare.

·         It is easy to get things out if proportion

·         Trivial problems are never disasters.

Always look for alternatives to unhelpful thinking. Remember that negative thoughts are a barrier to success and healthy self esteem.