Step 1: Notice when you are ‘stuck’ in a negative pattern and notice how much time you spend absorbed with these thoughts. Is it minutes, hours, days or weeks?
Step 2: When you have notice that you are stuck, practice seeing a big red “STOP” sign and say “STOP” to yourself to halt the flow of negative thoughts. Some survivors have worn a rubber band around their wrists to flick to remind them on a physical level to stop their thought patterns. Others have tried shouting “STOP” and have clapped their hands so that the sound interrupts their thoughts.
Step 3: Immediately shift your focus onto something neutral, calming or positive near you; for example, you could look out a window and focus on the clouds, sun, wind or rain, you could look at the lines on your hand or freckles on your arms, the objects on your desk or table in front of you, or you could focus on the ground or carpet. Think about the positive aspects of the things you are looking at.
Step 4: To help you with this process you may want to develop a range of neutral, calming, pleasant positive thoughts and images that you can easily shift your thinking onto, as a replacement for the abuse related “stuck” thoughts. If you have spent a great deal of time focusing on the past or an abuse related thinking then, by thought stopping and shifting your focus to more positive future oriented thinking, you can benefit from thinking more future solution focused thoughts. Plan what you want to use your new future solution focus thinking time on.
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